Unseen and Unheard
Letter of 12 December, 1944
Names have been CHANGED to preserve the anonymity of the persons concerned.
Erika to Franz
p. 11-16
NB: [Erika does sign most of her letters to Franz with her name, but with a word I read as “Stück”. Literally translated it means “piece”. I guess it was some nickname between them, like she calls him “My little bear”. In the translation, I am using her real name and add “Stück” in brackets, because “Stück” is indeed a very unusual term, even for a nickname; the translator]
My dear little bear. It happened as I had hoped. Today I received your letter dated 4th of the month. Even if I received your letter from the 6th of the month before this one, still it made me incredibly happy and I'm very thankful for it. It is lovely when I continue to receive letters from you, and you keep me updated this way. I am very grateful for the support your words give me and all of us in these difficult times. And some kind words I need especially now. Today they bombarded the town again and people got killed and injured. Even if Wiesbaden is not a main target, still they drop a few bombs here every time they pass over and that is enough to scare us. Today I was on the street to watch them overflying in some distance. Mostly they fly along the Taunus [a low mountain range]. Today the weather was marvellous, and it was the best weather for our fighter planes, but I did not see any of them. I only could see enemy planes together with their fighter aircrafts. The bombs which fell on us today were dropped by a single plane which left its group. When I saw this plane changing its course and coming lower towards the town I ran into the shelter, and I was hardly downstairs when I heard the detonations. When I went back up and reached the Station Road, I could still see the dust above the buildings. They hit the Dotzheimer Street again. They hit this road almost every time! It is strange how they always bomb the same neighbourhoods. When you come for your next visit you will find the place looking different. But life must go on. However, one gets tougher to be able to face the misery and suffering. Sometimes the worries make me feel very old. You are right, wherever you look, everywhere is the same. One would like to help and still one cannot help, not even oneself.
Mrs. Pavola has definitely a hard time now that her Franz will not return ever again. You see, this is the worst about all the bombs. One can deal with terror but not with losing a loved person. I think when this happens you have only pain and sorrow in your heart. Even if it is difficult to find the suitable words, if you could write to Mrs. Pavola it might give her some consolation receiving a letter from you since she holds you dearly. The more people die the more difficult it becomes for the surviving to carry the misery. But you and me, we keep our tails up! Life is so much easier when you are in love like we are now. Do not worry about me, you must be free in your mind to be able to fight and to focus on surviving. Whenever I see the enemy planes getting closer, I think of you and that maybe you are deployed in fighting them off. And then I think of you and wish that you stay safe. Everything will turn out fine. We must remain optimistic. I'm so happy about all the time we were able to spend together in Babenhausen. It would be much more difficult if we had not all these memories. This way both of us have something to give us strength. Once I travelled to Babenhausen where I talked to a gentleman about the war and I became impatient because the train was delayed a lot. He told me when someone is forced to wait and to be patient one should become stubborn. He meant to say I should think of some nice events and then the waiting would not be so difficult. And he was right. I am following his advice and it really helps especially when one must sit in the shelter for hours, something we have to do every day. At the moment the bomber airplanes come in the morning at around 11:00 o'clock and then it's takes nearly three hours each time. Our skin is turning pale from sitting in the shelters. I am missing the air and the view also because in the office we have to close the curtains all day long to keep out the cold and so we must switch on the light continuously. But since I feel quite healthy, I do not mind the paleness. And as soon as the days get longer, I will get some colour in my face again.
I am including two photos made in summer showing the youngest children in the house. One of them, Karla, has changed already much. She is such a sweet darling, always laughing. Especially in the morning inside the air raid shelter when other people would like to sleep a bit more, but this little person does not care at all!
Now I must come to an end, and I hope that you continue being strong and optimistic like in your last letters.
Lots of love and kisses
Your Erika! [Stück]